I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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