ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
