My nipple is on Facebook.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
