Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
