Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize