I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
