So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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