Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
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