that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
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Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
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Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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