You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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