Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize