im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize