I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
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