It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Randomize