it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
