im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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