He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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