speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize