So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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