party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Randomize
