You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
