I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize