I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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