hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I just want a box on franzia all to myself. Just me, my wine, my tears, & my self loathing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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