I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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