So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
