She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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