I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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