You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize