The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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