He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
