yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
