epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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