So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
I believe in your delicious
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
