I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
