you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize