Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
