help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
