is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
