i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Randomize
