I can't watch pbs sober anymore
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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