I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Don't EVER smell your tampon
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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