if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
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