Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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