so explain again why im purple
no
Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
