I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
