I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
