watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
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