Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I want to make a zoo with you.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
