i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
A+ Viking dick
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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